Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
