He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
