Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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