How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Randomize
