I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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