Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
