im drinking this country out of the recession.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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