smell my finger.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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