Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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