She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
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My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
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I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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