They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
