so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
COCAINE IS GR8
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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