he told me I talked like a deaf person
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
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a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
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you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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