Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
time to smoke my breakfast
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
