you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
That accounts for only three of the penises
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
