We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
