tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
