i would punch a child for taco bell
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
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