You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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