she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You ruined the universe
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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