There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
