Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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