I wanna bring you to show and tell
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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