my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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