If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.