I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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