Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
