my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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