Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
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after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
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This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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