I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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