hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
