are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.