dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
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Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
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I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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