How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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