Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Drunk is not a location!
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize