I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
It's Friday. Sex?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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