so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
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