i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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