he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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