At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize