they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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