My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Randomize
