i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
How does it feel to date your dad?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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