I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I just want to make out with him forever
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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