As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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