He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
