Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Houston, we have a blender
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
This toilet bowl is my home.
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