I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
