is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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