69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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