please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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