so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
