Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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